provo's bizarre dating practices, episode one

hot tubbing.


and by hot tubbing i do not mean "sitting in a hot tub with your friends".
i am referring to the bizarre social/dating event practiced every night (except sundays!) in the city of provo.
pick any spring/summer weeknight and you'll find hordes of YSAs wearing their best swimsuits at the nearest apartment complex's hot tub. sitting there, just sitting there, staring at each other. staring at wet, under-clothed strangers.
since when was this the cool place to pick up potential dating partners?
i mean, pools? sure! swim around and make new friendz, whatevs. but hot tubs create this palpable sexual tension that i'm just not okay with. plus, i have a strict no bros dating policy (not that i'm assuming that bros would ever want to date me, because they wouldn't) which leads to my general dislike of people who hot tub. one of my roommates has a crush on this dude that she works with. he told her that he goes hot tubbing weekly at our apartment complex, so she should come down and meet him there sometime. so yaknow, naturally, we all went with her. 
i'll spare you all the details, but you should know that the highlight of the evening was meeting an albanian named flacka (no offense to her, she was seriously awesome). 
mostly my point is that provo makes no sense to me. word of warning: when they tell you everyone is love-hungry in the springtime, they are not kidding.
i'm not trying to sound like a dating authority because oh heck no, i am not. but i do know a little bit about actual relationships, because i've seen a lot. and i've seen a lot end.
and you know what it all comes down to? it comes down to how honest you are, your attitude, & trust.
start looking for that instead of the hot tubber with the nicest bod, yeah? ...oh i should really stop being so cynical--go for it if you want to. for me, i'm not going to find anything worth keeping in a hot tub.

in the meantime, take a look at these talks:
elder holland, how do i love thee
president hinckley, and the greatest of these is love


to all you young, single provo residents: chill. yeah, it's springtime. yeah, all your friends might be getting engaged. but the right one will come along when they're supposed to. and they'll be all that sunshine you dream about, and they'll look at you with disney eyes & you won't care what other people think so you'll mack in public, all will be a bed of roses,
and the rest of provo will barf. 
til then, 
" In a dating and courtship relationship, I would not have you spend five minutes with someone who belittles you, who is constantly critical of you, who is cruel at your expense and may even call it humor. Life is tough enough without having the person who is supposed to love you leading the assault on your self-esteem, your sense of dignity, your confidence, and your joy. In this person's care you deserve to feel physically safe and emotionally secure. "
--elder holland


don't waste your time and don't settle.


good love is on the way,
promise, so don't try too hard for it,
& instead just become the best you can be,


han