Thursday, November 3, 2011

Oh, The Awkward Phase.


The most wonderful phase.
You know about the awkward phase, don't you?
You must. Because, unless you are six years old, you have already lived through it.
Or, in some cases, are currently in it.

It generally starts close to age seven and usually ends around age thirteen.
For some, it begins sooner. For some, it lasts shorter. And for some, it lasts much longer.

And our mothers were so nice to us, telling us we were the most beautiful things in the world.
Which, to them, I'm sure that we really were the most beautiful things.
And, in that phase, I definitely thought I was the hottest thing.
I think we all did.
And, looking back...
The awkward phase truly was the most glorious time of my life.


Remember being in that phase?
And all the awkward things you did?
And all the awkward things you wore?
And all the awkward things you said?

I sure do.

The choker necklaces. The butterfly clips. The strange teeth. The misunderstood mind. The love for the Disney Channel. The overalls. The chicken scratch handwriting. The constant singing of Britney Spears. The thinking it's awesome to put your younger siblings through hell.
It's all so clear to me.

Those were the glory days.
You see, it doesn't matter what you do in the awkward phase.
Because you're ugly no matter what. And so is everybody else in the phase
.
And that's what made us all awesome when we were at this point in our lives.

We were all awkward together.
We were all ugly together.
We were all awesome together.

Meet me, in my awkward prime:



I was not cute.
But you better believe that I was awesome.

Sometimes I'm pretty sure that I'm still in the awkward phase.
Because sometimes I show the symptoms.
And, to be clear, let's review the symptoms of the awkward phase.

You might be in the awkward phase if...
- you talk to yourself in the mirror.
- people laugh when you are dancing.
- you make funny faces when you are by yourself in public.
- nobody knows how to respond to some of the things you say.
- it's difficult to be taken seriously.
- people tell you that you look hilarious when you are hysterically crying.
- you sometimes say things louder than you had originally intended.
- you always have dirt under your fingernails.
- potty humor is funnier to you than it should be.
- your idea of flirting involves insults and wiping boogers.
- your laugh makes people feel uncomfortable.
or if
- you do weird things without warning for no comprehensible reason.

If any of these apply to you, you might be in the awkward phase.

I love the awkward phase.
I have two brothers who are currently in the midst of the awkward phase.
And every second of being with them is an absolute hoot.

Long Live the Awkward Phase.


Those days consisted of some good times.
I met a lot of my very best friends in the awkward phase.

Ari.
Shelbie.
Hannah.
To name a few.

We were so cute and ugly and awkward.

Embrace your inner awkward.

Awkward is as awkward does.

Awkwardly yours, 
Mallory.

3 comments:

  1. i do all of those... every day.... i knew it.

    ReplyDelete
  2. my life is an awkward phase.

    & i think this post is the best post i've read. ever.

    ReplyDelete
  3. my life. still. never grown out of that blessed stage. probably never will. i wipe boogers when i flirt...what?


    maybe not that one.

    ReplyDelete

you look really good today!