i did it, my friends.
i followed my own advice.
& i was brave. and people didn't make me nervous.
i learned that all those people i listed before. they are just people, and now they are my friends.
and they like me too.
i also learned that even when things fall apart. they can fall back together.
and when they do, they often go even better than you planned.
i learned that thinking about books and music and friendships and conference talks (instead of clothes and boys and food and unhappy things) makes your mind feel very much at ease in the crazy world surrounding you.
and i also learned that, in the words of james,
in the time it takes to know someone, it all can change, before you know it's gone.
sometimes people leave. right when you think you know them. and you think they love you.
not in a romantic relationship way, i don't mean. but i mean anybody. with anybody it can happen.
but well. the comforting thing is that new ones always enter.
and maybe you'll find that the new ones are just what you need.
and such is life.
and such is how we grow.